Grandpa Had Schizophrenia

I've always known that Mom hated her dad; he'd been so mean to her. Clarice, mom's younger sister, had been more docile, but Mom stood up to him, toe-to-toe, and they had an openly hostile relationship. (Laying a template for Mom's relationship with Dad, no doubt.) And I've known that in his later years Grandpa lived at the VA hospital due to schizophrenia. Mom didn't attend his funeral.

I met him twice: at a visit to the hospital when I was 13, with Mom, Grandma, Clarice, and my cousin. We went out to lunch, and it all seemed fine, though I remember Mom and Grandma were tense, hoping he'd behave. Met him again at 20, again visiting the hospital with Grandma and Clarice.

Mom talked very little about him. The only story I'd heard while growing up was that he was paranoid and disinhibited, would say wildly inappropriate things to women, of a sexually accusing and vulgar nature. The example she gave was that Grandma went to a movie theater, and Grandpa spent days afterward accusing her of having sex with all the men in the theater. Wouldn't drop it, would bring it up again and again. 

So it's just beginning to seep in how hard my grandma's marriage must have been. He was significantly older than she -- she was 22 and he was 36 when they married in 1925. Dapper dresser, good looking, it's easy to see how he swept her off her feet. They look happy in their wedding photos. 

Letters:
1960 - from the state hospital: "...you know as well as any of us that Clarence will say and write things which are not exactly truthful. It is true that we occasionally allow a wife to take a patient out ... we do not believe your husband is able under any circumstances to leave the hospital at the present time and make a go of it, but would be causing trouble and would be back in a very short time." The letter refers to a post he'd sent her without permission, "we trust that you will not feel badly over Clarence's demands that he be taken home." At the time this letter was written, Grandma was 57 (wow, my age now!), Mom was 30, and I would be born 4 months later. 

1966 - from the state hospital - the VA has a bed for him, and they want to transfer him. He moved to the VA hospital in May of 1966.

1969 - from the VA hospital - "in your letter [to his doctor] you expressed your desire to have the hospital continue to give your husband custodial care. During our phone conversation of 12/20/68 we discussed the possibility of having Clarence come home for at least brief trial visits. Since our discussion, the Medical Staff has met and decided that Clarence will be placed in a nursing home on this station." I think that was the last time they raised the question of ever discharging him to her care. 

Grandma wrote a huge volume of letters to Mom in 1974, and again in 1980. I'm curious to find what those are about. And when did he first have to go live at the hospital? Mom's letters begin in 1948, when she went to college. Maybe there's more information there? Oh! Plus I have many of Grandma's letters to Clarence, apparently he kept his letters too.

The only other things I know about Grandpa: 
- He was born on Leap Day, so at 84, he'd only had 21 official birthdays.
- He was born on Guernsey, a British island off the coast of France.
- His father was born in India, my great-great grandfather part of opening trade between England and India.
- Either he or his father changed his last name to Smith for awhile, then back. No idea why.

I remember being relieved when I safely got through my 20s without symptoms of schizophrenia.